So let’s see what Coprofago did on “Unorthodox Creative Criteria”.
God damn! You didn’t? No… I must be… oh… No.
This is “Destroy Erase Improve” all over the place. Why oh why. I can’t believe this shit. I would expect you guys would stop ripping-off Meshuggah and start to have your own stuff but nooooo, you had to rip-off Meshuggah once again. This time even more perfectly, since the production is better and the vocals are even more Jens Kidman alike. I could swear that this was Jens Kidman singing. I had to triple check the credits. Twilight zone if you ask me.

OK. I have to be honest. It’s not all Meshuggah. We have thirteen songs. Some of them are like Extol and we still have room for some experimentalism, to bad that they are Allan Holdsworth all over the place. Surprise surprise Allan Holdsworth is the major influence of Fredrik Thordendal [Meshuggah's guitar player].

This album has a lot of work, I had to admit it. But… Man, this is identical…
I’ll try to describe the album anyway.

First track is “Crippled Tracker”. Meshuggah all the way. Vocals start and, is this Jens Kidman or what? You’ll have the chance to compare them.

“The Inborn Mechanics”. This is a major rip-off of Meshuggah’s style and I can compare it with one particular Meshuggah song. Check this out: Transfixion
The middle part even has that jazzy [Meshuggah riped-off Allan Holdsworth, and Coprofago ripped both of them] clean parts. That arpeggio chords are so unique.

“Neutralized” is different. Less Meshuggah. More Extol tough [older Extol, not the new pussy Extol]. I have to state that the solos are identical to the ones Fredrik plays also. Bet you didn’t see that one coming -_-

“Merge Into” is an interlude. Allan Holdsworth all the way. Just in case your are thinking I’m crazy check this out: Allan Holdsworth

Next in line is “Fractures”. This is a two minute track. Kind of different. Probably the only not “a major rip-off track” in the record. Weird track nevertheless.

Almost half the record is gone and it’s time for more Meshuggah!!! Shit, I meant Coprofago.
With “Hostile Silent Raptures” we have another element of the Meshuggah style. Yes, the three man singing chorus. End section has a Fredrik alike solo and whatever. This is just absurd.

“Isolated Through Multiplicity” is another Allan track. This guys are great musicians with great technique, no doubt about that. To bad they record this massive rip-offs.

At this point the album becomes a little boring. Not compact at all. Scattered songs with no flow. One Meshuggah track, one Allan Holdsworth track, one violin with synths track ["Glimpses"], another Meshuggah track ["Constriction"] and the album finishes up with two seven minute tracks. “Motion” and “Wavelength”.

What can I say. Very disappointing record. I tough they would improve but, instead they sticked with the Meshuggah rip-off songwriting. Personally I have no interest in this kind of bands. I stick with the original stuff. I stick with MESHUGGAH.

Coprofago – The Inborn Mechanics
Coprofago – Isolated Through Multiplicity

This Educated Horses is the most laid back, groovy album i have ever heard….that would be true if i was a coke addict trying to sell my ass on the street, this album is a disgrace, it’s basically a money machine, everyone does it, but most do something like “the best of Mariah Query” or “Michael Jacson’s how time flies, when your with children”, doing a brand new album is not that common, i know, i know since you started making movies your low on cash, but please do some work, there are people paying for this shit, they have children to feed, think of the children, just like Michael, why don’t you think of the children

What have you done? There isn’t anything in this album i can hold on, not one decent music, if you wanted to make a voice book about zombies, death or american witches, just say it on the cover, because this is not music, this is you talking with some annoying background sound that just goes on and on and on, hell even your voice sounds lazy, you are lazy bastard, everyone loves a bastard, but a lazy one? fuck you, and fuck your dumb ass music.

p.s.1 Your movies are great, i have an idea, do like Jennifre Lopes and move to the movies permanently…what?, wait, she didn’t?…well she sucked on both jobs anyway.

p.s.2 The names are all correctly spelled, the fact that actual people have this names is purely coincidental ^^

Rob Zombie – American Witch

So Lost and Found is here, i really don’t know if i can’t talk about this album, i just feel betrayed …. ohhh good whyyyyy … well now that that’s over, this one is a “stupify” album (you’ll get it later on), it starts with a more mature Mudvayne meets “the ohhhh so popular but ohh so shitty” Drowning Pool with “Determined”, humm “Pushing Through” humm this reminds me of something … ohh yes recycling old Mudvayne songs and put a more… likable chorus, does that count as being sell outs?, i get so confused, maybe it’s because i heard the same thing 6 years ago, but 6 year ago it was fresh and kinda interesting…

So i skip ahead to “Happy?” (is it me or this fucking album is a fucking relapse), as a rule of thumb, if the name of the music is anywhere the most important part of the chorus, then the music sucks, except if your Korn, then it doesn’t matter since they all suck, “IMN” goes the same way, “Fall Into Sleep” … i bet this one is their second single, more plain shit… well at least its a bit better then “Happy?” that or I’m losing my mind, “Rain. Sun. Gone.” well it’s the first song i saw with that many periods, and what do i learn? everything goes to distract you from listening to shit, next up is “Choices” appropriate since I’m thinking of cutting this one short, “Choices” is another washed up, ditto on “Forget To Remember”, “TV Radio”, “Just”…shit the rest is irrelevant.

Just tell me, how many times can you play the same thing?, i actually liked their first album, but i don’t know what this is, well i know, it’s the same thing a hundred bands are playing, its washed out for the masses, its simplified for plain consumption, i don’t expect all bands to try to excel in every album (there are some exceptions to my last statement) but i expect if you are going to change, to try and do it better, make it interesting, don’t just go all Korn on me and just play the same shit over and over again, just like a vinyl, letting it get worse and worse each time around, well anyway if your into Drowning Pool, Disturbed or Korn, then you can give this one a go.

Mudvayne – Determined

Ok let’s have a look at Start A War, Static-X use a very straight forward formula, simplistic guitar work, very by the numbers drumming, average metal vocals (not very good on the more heavy screaming) and the use of electronics to accentuate the music (since everything else doesn’t really help), there are a couple of palatable tracks, like “Enemy” with its fast pace and actually a catchy chorus, “I Want To Fucking Break It” because it has circus music, “Night Terrors” well it’s classic Static-X stuff (sounds like post “Follow the Leader” Korn, well all of their last album sounded like Korn, or is it the other way around…) and probably “Just in Case” because it’s a bit different, the rest are just filers or “beyond the point of reason” moronic tracks.

Well even thought this is incredibly dumb down music, i tend to sympathise with Static-X since they seem to be doing this on purpose, dumb down music for dumb down people, its supposed to be simplistic catchy music, how are people going to scream the chorus, especially if it’s someone like Behemoth, GRAUUGLLLL doesn’t sound that good…hehehe, is this great music?, hell no, it’s trash, but its the kind of trash that doesn’t offend that much, and that a lot of people seem to like, hey whatever makes everyone happy, if your into pseudo tech metal with bands like Reaktor or Sybreed, then Static-X is for sure the cream of that crop.

Static-X – The Enemy

The album starts with “Take this Life” that basically just…well shows, what the rest of the album is, nice thrash metal, great guitar work, with clean vocals chorus (note i didn’t say great melodic chorus), i have to say most of them are good, but some are really lame, the In Flames seem to think that you need to put a melodic part on every songs, and some times it just sounds too off place, next comes “Leeches” uhhh bad bad chorus, and this is not the only track, next comes “Reflect the Storm” and another week track, especially on the chorus, really nasty, what was Anders thinking, lets just go to “Dead End” this one has female vocals, and again a letdown, they just changed the “here comes the chorus and now i have to squeeze my balls to sing like a girl” by an actual girl, seems again a bit overdone and therefore irrelevant.

“Scream” YOU DIRTY SLUTS!!!!…. for sure i’m gonna scream, what a confusion of a song…and not in a good (math metal) kind of way, its for sure, going up for nomination as the worst in the album, then the title track, “Come Clarity” the calm track, well the chorus is not that bad, but the verse is a complete disgrace, the album is starting to feel really bad, and the rest doesn’t grows on me, or they do a lousy job, like in “Vacuum”, “Vanishing Light” or they do an ok job like in “Crawl Through Knives”, “Pacing Death’s Trail”, “Versus Terminus” or “Our Infinite Struggle”, then the album dies on you with some shitty ambient noise, i hate bands that do this, it just fills the cd and adds nothing, lazy.

So are In Flames sell-outs?, well if you are die-hard fans, for sure, this album doesn’t bring anything new, worse, it just spreads apart even more the two In Flames mobs, it does tend to just waste tracks in search of that allusive perfect melody/metal combo, the problem is that they aren’t playing on some garage, they are pros, and as pros this doesn’t look that good, actually for me it looks like shit, but if your into shit than go ahead…just kidding ^_^; the album as great guitar work, i wouldn’t expect less from In Flames, but the vocals/lyrical department is failing, and that just ruins the experience, so in the end, if you are into metalcore or you already know this “Rerouted and Remaining” In Flames you will probably like it, if you want something really good, i would go somewhere else.

In Flames – Take This Life

Ohhh

So lets just hear this, the first track is “540,000° Fahrenheit”, uhh nice production, it almost seems where just right there on your garage, listening to this demo, what a confusion of a song, the timing is just so off, it’s just random stuff thrown into the mix, one of those talking barbies has more rhythm than this, this is brilliant, if you’re 12 years old and playing with a plastic toy guitar, lets just forget it and just go to the title track “Transgression”, what the fuck, this is just horse playing, what is this, what the fuck is this, this is not music, this is a loop on a drum machine with a constipated old man talking nonsense on the toilet, shit, shit, shit.

“Spinal Compression” … ok is this the same music as before, is the old guy still on the toilet? Of course he is, does any part of this song make any sense, of course not, they say this is a experimental album, for sure, its experimental as hell, giving good people bad music, did i say music i wanted to say ass, “Contagion”…. ohhh there is a bass player, almost forgot there was someone there, ohhh i guess he was just late to the party, yeah nice one, just in time to add nothing to another soulless performance, is Burton (the guy in the cd credits after the word vocalist) trying out for a record of some sorts?, the most “badly out of tune distorted out of tempo chorus in the history of the know universe” record, for sure i’m starting to question my sanity and my health.

“Empty Vision” it is, finally an appropriate song title, that clearly defines it’s content, it sure is empty and it sure lacks vision, i would have to fucking stick pencil in my ears to appreciate this nonsense, “Echo Of My Scream” the titles do seem to picture well my fall into what i can only describe as a complete chaotic mindfuck breakdown, i have lack of words, i’ll need therapy after this shit, thank god i’ve got two pencils in my ears as my only life line to sanity, so with blood gushing from my head, i do realize the pointless en devour that it is, to continue with this, so i’ll just sum it up, “Supernova” do you like the band Orgy, this is a bad copy of the same pretencions shit, “New Promise” do you like the band blink 182, same shit, but at least the blink folk know what a song is, “I Will Follow”, the most idiotic music intro i’ve ever heard, “Millenium“, this one should be used to torture muslims, since they don’t know what good metal is they won’t find it too offensive, “Moment Of Impact” ohh shit can a band repeat a song on a album, how bizarre, why make two songs when you can put two copies of just one, i won’t even talk about “New Promise”

So what more can i say, the evidence here is that anyone can make sounds, i’m making a sound right now (it resembles blood dripping from my head), but making music is another matter, and Fear Factory doesn’t know how to make music, for a sound to be called music, be it good or bad, it has to have a little thing called structure, Fear Factory bad riffs, bad drumming, bad lyrics, bad vocals, it’s all bad, but above all else there is a complete lack of structure, therefore it’s just random sound, know what, change the vocalist to a constipated old man on a toilet, put a 12 year old on the guitars, forget about bass, and just put a random sample on a drum machine, and i’ll bet that they will ROCK THE FUCK out of Fear Factory.

There is no mp3, no links and gets to be tagged as Crap, anything else i would call cruel punishment.